I think it's safe to say, though, that Mom would be proud of us one year later, living our lives, enjoying our families and friends, growing in our faith, doing good and productive work, staying in touch with one another and remembering the happy times even as we create new memories.
More times than I can count I've reached for the phone to call Mom to share something fun with her or thought of how much she would enjoy knowing about one thing or another. Her enthusiasm about every aspect of our lives--major events or insignificant little happenings--just made everything more special. She was the go-to person for advice on health issues great or small or just to bolster your esteem on a hard day. I still miss her encouraging ways . . . and a million other things.
But she taught us how to love and encourage one another, and I am grateful for that. And even though it still hurts so much that she's gone, and even though this Christmas it really somehow felt like I was just going through the motions in some ways . . . I keep thinking about this crazy, messed-up, sin-filled world
And as John King told us and I've thought of often this year and Dad reminded me recently . . . "she wouldn't want to come back!" I don't know if any of you feel like sharing your thoughts here but please commment if you'd like.
2 comments:
I remember all too clearly the first Christmas season after my family lost our mom to cancer, and the mix of sadness and joy it was. Even though I still miss her 14 years later, I am so glad her body is whole again, as it was designed to be. I feel deeply for all of you and regret you have to walk the same path my family did. I hope our moms are having coffee together, discussing how proud they are of all of us!
I was on vacation until today. I had a great time. Once in a while I thought, "Today's the anniversary..." of the funeral, or the visitation, or her death, and I would tear up a little. Still trying to figure out what it will be like to live without having mom for over a year. Will I start forgetting her mannerisms and how soon? I have been saying stuff more like, "Mom would never do that" in comparison to something I do that I don't like, like thinking negatively about someone. I don't remember her or dad ever saying bad things about anyone. I guess I'm trying to look at my life and ask how I can be more like her.
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